Work Life Balance

I wrote the other day about having balance in the gym routine. Lots of people tend to work the muscles they feel are seen; guys work arms and chest, women abs and legs. But a very important part of the gym workout is making sure you have symmetry and balance in your appearance.

The same can be said of life. Some work hard for appearances of wealth and neglect other aspects of their lives. I am not saying that wealt is a bad thing. Far from it. Wealth makes many things possible. It also makes life more enjoyable. But if that is your main focus, and other parts of your life suffer, you are in a losing situation.


I have tried through the years to keep a balance and to keep things in perspective. I got a yin yang tattoo many many years ago (before the surge in popularity of that sort of thing, and the whole Asian influence explosion) That tattoo was placed to remind me to keep things even. In my mind it is the mental and the physical that needs balance. And then in those groups are the sub-categories.

Mental can be broken down into learning and growing mentally and into spiritualism. you can continue to break these down as you will. Spirituality can be religion or it can be communicating with nature, god, goddess, the universe, a tree, whatever you think is the right thing at the time. Mental growth can be school, a mentor, a book or surfing the web.

Physical can be broken into your living state (house, car, money, family) and into your physical well being, basically meaning your health. Health can be how your body is functioning as a unit of sustaining your brain, and how you are maintaining that state through physical activity, sustenance and such. I take sustenance one step further (and I think it is a needed step) that you are not only eating properly, whole food as close to nature as possible, but that you are also supplementing your diet with things it does not contain.

There is a lot that I have just written on in a short few paragraphs, but these are things that some people forget as they try to ‘make ends meet.’ There is so much more to life than that, and if you stay in a perpetual state of worry over making ends meet, you are holding yourself and those around you down to that state. I really have found that by focusing on positive aspects, even in the most negative situations, thing turn the corner. Without getting to deep into it, my life took a serious downturn about six months ago, and we could have decided to focus on the worst, but we didn’t and have come out of all of it stronger and in a better place, I think both physically and mentally speaking.

Don’t ever give up. Balance your life through doing the things you need to do to survive and also doing things that are going to take you to a higher place.

Life - Changing in an Instant

This morning I was filming some workout tips for another blog that I maintain. Interestingly enough (or perhaps ironically enough, as I don’t know how totally interested you will be) I managed to twist my back just a tiny bit and now I am bent over double in pain. Why was it ironic, you may ask. I was doing a piece on working out and talking about avoiding injury during a work out. Nice, huh?

The injury occurred before I began filming. I was moving the bench that I was going to be lying on for the lifting portion of the demonstration. Unbeknownst to me my son had a few dumb bells on the floor by the bench and when I went to move the bench there was an extra 25 pounds. An unknown obstacle and an unsuspecting force…and down I went. *groan*

Why do I share my pain? Not to gain sympathy, although that would be appreciated, but to say, we never know from one moment to the next what is going to hit us. So if you are putting things off until tomorrow, remember that tomorrow may not come, or it may find you in an entirely different state of being.
Quite a feather in her cap

Quite a feather in her cap

One of my favorite quotes from Janis Joplin is “Tomorrow never comes man. It’s all the same f*ing day” There was something in there about cats, too, but I’ll leave that to Janis. She was a person who embraced life and didn’t give a crap about what people thought. She did what she thought she ought to do, and if you didn’t like it, well, too bad.

She also had a lot of issues, but I’ll also leave that alone. The point is my back spasms, a temporary thing, could have just as easily been something different. Situations arise and some of them we have no control over, so you know, don’t put things off until tomorrow. It’s all the same day, and we need to take care of things now.

This is rambling a bit, and that I’ll admit, but if there is something you need to say or do, take care of it. Appreciate what you have and what you could have if you would just reach out and bridge that gap, hold out a hand to someone that you know and let them know you are there, and you care.

Appreciation and gratitude are two of the biggest pieces to the mindset of success.
My "Other" Blog

Laid Off - Heading to a New Day

Thursday I got laid off. This came as a total shock to me, although probably it shouldn’t have. I was told, don’t know if this is true or not, that I was just the first of a small group that was being let go. I was talking a vacation day (comp time) Friday, so I was first in line. Everyone who gets laid off, gets laid off on Fridays, or so I am told. Except me. So when is a three day weekend, not a three day weekend? When it’s the start of an extended lay off.

Not extended, because there is going to be no recall. Now my side efforts are building, but not making money yet. We are close to breakthrough on a number of projects, so I can hope that perhaps soon, I won’t need a traditional job at all. Time will tell.

The funny thing about the layoff is that I had joked with Deb about quitting and going to the unseminar in Texas with her. I said let’s live on the edge, I’ll just quit and go with you. I also had a dream that I was going to be laid off. I should trust my instincts.

I was already putting in applications prior to getting laid off, so perhaps I did know that it might be coming. I had been handed the job of safety manager, which I had emphatically told them I did not want. I told them that when I was hired. I told them that at my review. Then they gave that position to me, on top of the training job. Same pay, of course, as they said and others have said to me “You’re lucky to have a job.” Well, that’s done with now.

I don’t have sour grapes. I offered to do training for them as a consultant, and I think they are going to take me up on that. Of course it depends what they are going to pay me whether I do it or not, but the bridges aren’t burned. Walls turned sideways are bridges. Have you ever heard that saying? It’s a quote from Angela Davis. I am looking at this as a bridge for sure. A bridge to a life I’ll be more happy in.

It’s also said that when a door closes a window opens. I have always been a glass is half full kind of guy. How many more clichés can I throw in here?

If anyone knows of any training gigs, let me know. I can teach OSHA stuff, Forklifts, Cranes, Communications, MS Office. Most of those I have certificates to teach, with the exception of office, but that I have been using effectively for many years and can teach basics of it very easily. I am mostly looking for consultant type work. One time or repetitive gigs, and I am also open to a ‘real job.’

Life is good.

$4500 in dental bills?

In an article on CNN it was stated that 7 in 10 Americans think the health care system needs major restructuring. No shit. And I mean that as, no shit it needs restructuring.

I am employed, at least for the time being, and have to pay into the system for medical and dental insurance for me and my family. Any given trip can turn our whole financial status into a juggling act. Example, my youngest daughter had some issues and needed to get blood work. The doctor decided that, not me. So we take her to get blood work and then we get a bill for $400. Ouch, WTF? What am I paying for health insurance for, if not to cover things the doctor orders? To add insult to injury, the results were borderline, so they order another batch. You know the people ordering another round of tests aren’t paying for the tests.

I go to the dentist. Studies have shown that dental infections actually have huge impact on overall health. I personally know two people who were sickly, and had all their teeth removed, got dentures and started enjoying a vastly improved state of well being. So dental care is important. As if you didn’t already know that.

I go to the dentist and get an exam, and afterwords they take me into a back room where I meet with a financial consultant to figure out how to pay for around $4,500 worth of repairs and stuff. $4500 dollars? And my teeth aren’t in bad shape. What’s wrong with that picture? They offer multi-year financing packages. Mind you that $4500 isn’t for my family, it’s just for me.

I had a co-pay there plus an up-front fee, totally around $200. That was for my exam. Then they sent a bill for another $100. I did mention I have dental insurance, right? I pay for a premium plan, which covers almost nothing whatsoever.

The point is, the system is broken. I can’t really afford to go to the dentist and the extended doctor bills prevent any sort of savings, or drain any savings I may have had. The punch line is that I have health insurance. What the hell do all the people do who are unemployed, employed part time, disability or whatever do?

There is debate if we as a country need to change things. I see people holding signs at right wing rallys saying “keep your change.” Well, for 8 years the Republicans didn’t do a whole lot to address all this. Now the shit hits the fan as the new President tries to do something to take care of this. People say we can’t afford it, but we don’t have an option. We pay for healthcare through insurance premiums and taxes anyway, we need to define it, and make it so everyone can afford to get the care they need.

Here’s the link to the article, if you’re interested.

An Odd One

This has been a really odd week. I was exhausted after working 10+ hours on Saturday (First time I’ve worked a Saturday in at least five years) and that surprised me. I used to work 7 days a week at the steel mill and never was so tired after a shift. Deb and I then went to visit some friends for dinner and we didn’t get home until around 11. Sorta late, but after that day I was dragging.

Sunday I was supposed to have rehearsal for Dutch Blitzkrieg, and I just couldn’t do it. I hardly wanted to get out of my chair, and couldn’t see any energy available, so I bailed on that. I almost never miss rehearsals. So I go to work Monday and I feel OK. I have a busy day and eat a burger leftover from Sunday’s dinner and around 130 or 2 I start feeling really bad. Doubled over in pain. I think, seriously, that I am having a heart attack. It doesn’t abate. After about fifteen minutes I leave work, without a word to anyone.

I am clutching my gut and feel like I ought to vomit. This is for the whole drive home. I am constantly looking for where I can pull over in case I do have a heart attack. I am seriously feeling very ill. I get home and eventually start to throw up, just a little bit. I do this on and off for hours. I’m figuring that I had food poisoning, although I couldn’t swear to it.

In the back of my mind I am hoping to feel a little better because I have an audition for Catch 22 at 7pm. By six I am feeling a little better. Pain has scaled back a couple notches and I am not heaving anymore. So Deb and I go to auditions. (the show must go on) And they go well. I am cast, but haven’t heard what parts yet. It’s a multi-part show with all the actors taking multiple roles. Deb is also in the cast.

Tuesday I wake up and still have this stomach pain, but it is minor compared to the day before. I decide to take a vacation day and sleep in until almost 11. That is pretty much unheard of for me. Guess my body needed to recuperate. I am also preparing for a paranormal meeting for Tuesday night. getting some evidence together. We have two hunts to reveal and evidence is not falling into place. There is a lot of stuff to go through, and I am not in the mood, but it has to be done.

We have the meeting and it goes well. I actually have people wanting to help with the editing and evidence compilation. That is what I needed to hear. I was feeling overwhelmed with it. I have been doing all of that for the past year with little help. It was wearing on me.

it's a late night

You know, here's the question. If someone tells you that you've been drinking too much on a given night (not on an ongoing basis) what do you do? Do you act as if that was absurd, meaning that you simply go about your business in a 'normal' fashion, or do you think about it way too much and try to do the unexpected, which probably is what someone would do who had been drinking too much?

Not hypothetical. Real. Even in the event that I had X number of drinks, yet I recall Y number. With both people having Z number and no third party to authenticate, what is the proper protocol? I have no clue. My first inclination is to go for a walk, which I have done numerous times in the past. Yet I have had a terrible day. I have today felt as bad about work (J.O.B.) as ever in my life, and nearly quit at one point, or asked for a week off without pay, which I am sure would be viewed as some sort of anomaly.

No one does that. So I was feeling really down. To the point where I told people 'sort of' what I was feeling. Not the total picture, because that would have gone over like a ton of bricks and I am sure reported to someone or another and that may have been the end of this employment. I simply told a few people that I was at the end of my rope, meaning over my head and needing help. That's what you are supposed to do, right?

I went to HR (on the phone) and said , you know, I need to do "this" and I am feeling overwhelmed. What do you think I should do? who do you think I should turn to? I am talking to you, feeling I really don't need help, but just to vent." And she let me vent a bit and then I went on and did what I needed to do. It's my job, so I did it.

But I was feeling badly and ended up chasing my blues away with a bit of Old Grandad. Also still feeling in control of my facilities but not supported at this moment. So now I am heading to bed, and not out for a midnight stroll. Perhaps this is coherent, but maybe not. Perhaps...

Mid life crisis? or just time for a freakin change?

What sort of person decides to a serious change in their lives after living in a certain fashion, following some sort of plan for a period of time? Some people may think that I am describing a midlife crisis and you may be right. I really don't know I am just posing the question for consideration. Any thoughts/comments would certainly be welcome. I could even see adding a forum to this website, if there would be any interest. Wouldn't have to be on this particular topic but any esoteric sort of question that people would want to bat around. But that's another topic altogether.

Back to the discussion at hand. There are people who graduate high school (or perhaps don't even make it that far) who don't really plan out their lives so much as just live it day by day. There may be some planning, like going to a trade school or starting as a laborer at some factory or with a tradesman, hoping to move up and learn skills that can earn them better money, but then there are people who just drift from job to job, complaining about the unfairness of the 'minimum wage' which isn't enough to sustain a reasonable standard of living, unless your standard is pretty darn low.

I am not putting those folks down, and I am glad for them (unless they are surly while they serve me. (You made your bed, now lie in it) Someone has to do those jobs and I am glad it's not me.

I did my time as a laborer and working my way up the ladder at the steel mill, until I was just tired of the business, and the corporate culture and the politics of it all, and then I quit. Perhaps not the wisest move, but I felt inside that I needed to move on or I would end up there for a lifetime. Which is an OK choice for some people.

That gets me back on track with the topic here. What drives change? Most people are scared of change. They don't want to deal with it, they don't want to hear about it, they just put up a wall. Unless it's a gradual change that they feel comfortable with, or it's their idea.

Go to someone doing a job at a factory and propose a change to their work routine. Most people are going to fight the change. Go to that same person and ask what they think could be changed to make the job easier or better, and the attitude shifts. Suddenly change is a good thing. But this is just a minor example of change.

What if you go to that same person and tell them, here's a six month severance package, you need to find something else to do. Now you are going to have two different reactions. One is going to be the person who was sick of their job and really look at how the severance can be used to change their future, the other person will look at it as a six month paid holiday and then look for similar work when the free ride is over. That life is not changing.

You don't need to tell me that there are multiple other options, I am just looking at the first one really. Or in my case, someone who is ready to move on and the severance package isn't needed. People either start side jobs or businesses to try their hand at something, or to begin to build a sole proprietorship business. Or they look to freelance or do something that gives them pleasure and an income. Can you be happy earning less, but doing something you love? Could the thing you love turn out to be more lucrative than what you are doing now. Do you want change?

What is the mental mindset of someone who suddenly decides, yes, I am moving on from this. I never planned for "this" to be what I am about, and I am making the effort to change my circumstances.

Is it night school or is it getting involved with the local small business mentoring group? What causes the shift?

For me it was the thought (and this is why I think "midlife crisis" although crisis is really the wrong term, IMO) that unless I change NOW, I am not going to have time to do the things I want to with my life. I am about at midpoint, or a bit beyond, so what now?

Are you the kind of person who can make a change? Do you have to wait for children to be grown? Can you move to another state or country if that's what it takes? Can you leave the familiar behind?

It's not just the local coffee shop or your neighborhood. It's a lifetime of friends and relationships. Do people who drift more drift more easily? Is the fact that I have already made multiple transitions make the nex one easier? I know you can build new relationships. For some that building process is easier. For me, I find the local community theater and suddenly I have twenty new 'friends' that I can cultivate and weed through and probably find a few choice ones that can be nurtured.

Can you change? Do you want to change? How do you want to change? is it easier to think of the change as growth? How do you want to grow? Or do you want to grow?

Are you at a place in your life where things are looking so good that personal growth is not desired? I have heard once you stop growing you start dieing. I think that may be true for most people, but some people are happy in the role they have either chosen or have fallen into by chance.

Second City Training and lotsa stuff

way too much has happened recently to blog it all. Biggest news is that I completed Improv training and Sketch Writing at Second City in Chicago! woo

Met a ton of excellent people and got to know Adam and Andi better. Very interesting trip.
bit of my sketch writing (draft)
yesterday in writing we did an exercise where we deconstructed a fairy tale and then wrote a sequel. Mine was Goldilocks and the sequel was this ten point thing

1. Goldi’s mother Ravenlocks hears about the slaughter of her daughter

2. RL finds a gunsmith and test fires weapons

3. Bazookas were too loud

4. Lasers were too bright

5. chooses a M1A1 rifle with 30 round banana clip and M203 grenade launcher

6. finds cabin and kicks in door like she’s Chuck Norris

7. spray kitchen with all 30 rounds turning mama and baby bear into ground bear meat

8. drop rolls into living room and blast grenade at Papa bear. blows him to smitherines

9. fires up their grill

10. has bear bar b q

~~~~~~
went to see a cerazy number of acts while I was there. One highlight was Susan Messing and Frank Caliando. Amazing long form show at THE ANNOYANCE.
~~~~
I also wanted to add a link to my Headshot/resume. feel free to pass this on to anyone looking to hire a dedicated professional gifted actor and comic genius. (that would be me) Oh, did I mention modest? And a total team player. call me.

Lost my six jets, what a drag!

In the "life is crazy" category, I feel bad for the texas billionaire, Allen Something or other, who lost his six private jets, as the government is prosecuting him on a ponzi scheme.

He was complaining because he now has to go through security like most people. "I have to take my shoes off now" wah!

I am one of those odd people who actually likes to fly and don't mind the shoe thing too much. If I am flying it means I have something to do, and I have a budget to do it. That's the positive side of life.

Of course with that weird crash of the Air France jet, you have to wonder what is safe? I guess the odds are still in our favor flying, but when the engine in my Jeep fails, I can pull over to the side of the road.

Speaking of road, the road trip to Chicago and Second City is right around the corner. I'll be traveling with Andi and Adam, that should be interesting in its on right. I almost said it will be a trip. And it will, in all senses of the word.

Spending time back in Chicago. All of it is going to be amazing.

Oh, by the way, # yeah and $. I did a search on symbols in google and yahoo, and neither of those showed up. What does that mean?

blogosphere facebook twitter, et al

How much is too much? On Tuesday night my youngest daughter graduated from high school and one of the speeches was about how techical information was doubling every couple years now. Computers have gotten faster since you started reading this article. (barely joking there)

Social networking sites, online communication, tweet, twitter, faceSpace, MyBook, my other book, online articles, internet, brown paper tickets, online booking, my vacation –>priceline expedia cheap tickets. AAAAAHHHHHH!

Am I on overload yet? How the frack are we supposed to keep up with all this, or maybe should we even try? Twelve years ago I was on the cutting edge. I had an online blog, Chronological Disorder on GeoCities. Now I have blogs for four or five functions. Plus tracking SEO content, keywords, google ads, adwords, craigslist, freecycle. Wow the list just keeps on going.

Soon I am going to have to have a firewire jack into my skull. It’s coming, mark my words, it is coming. Do I want that? Maybe I should really learn how to type instead of this odd Mavis Beacon style of half knowing where keys are located. Hold on a second I have a text coming in on my phone. (full qwerty keyboard, not an option, a necessity) now I forward the text to Twitter, gotta keep my followers happy. They are hungry to hear of my latest non-event. Did I just cough? Better twit it.

Where are we all going with this? There is a split in the world with the online and the offline. I have events in my life that my younger brother never knows about, parties, shows, gigs…He’s of the off line group. He doesn’t want an on line life, and doesn’t see the need. My 80 year old mother has e-mail, my younger brother doesn’t. Huh?

I think we are nearly at the point where if you don’t have an internet connection you are going to be left behind. I will never give up my on line life, but sometimes I really wonder what would happen if I did.

Have I mentioned I am now involved in another business as a full partner? Coaching Tools and HR support material. Very rich package.

Slumdog Millionaire and the return of "The Amish Oracle"

Not really sure why I had two of the same posts and I don't know how to delete one, so I'll just post another bit of info.



Last night we finally watched Slumdog Millionaire and I have to say I was not really impressed. Why was this film the darling of the Oscars? I’m not saying I didn’t like it, but it was just OK. On the bright side, I didn’t pay for the rental. Steph and Zack had friends spend the night and one of Steph’s friends rented it. We just glommed on her rental. Hey it was just sitting around the house begging to be viewed again.

When did sleepovers become a part of American teen life? I know when I was a kid the only time there was a sleepover was if we were setting up a tent in the yard and building a fire and making smores and all that good stuff. And that was rare. I mean, I always heard about girls having slumber parties, but that was also not like a regular thing. Now it’s like my kids have someone over, or they are spending the night elsewhere, nearly every weekend. Funny how things change.

Back to Slumdog, I am still trying to figure out the popularity. The story was pretty good. **Spoiler alert** Spoiler alert even though probably everyone else has already seen this movie. I am usually last in line. Who doesn’t want to see someone who in enherently good win in the end? But wait. He wasn’t all that good. Stealing shoes, cheating tourists, in trouble with the law. The most crazy part was when he jumped into the shit and was covered head to toe with crap. I almost gagged. So yeah, coincidentally all the answers on the millionaire show tied right in with his odd life story. So if there would have been one question where he didn’t have a Colt shoved in his face, he might have missed that. The odds are so ridiculous, who could really believe it? And then the police are torturing him to find out how he’s cheating to win the game? Is that really even remotely possible?

I dunno. I’ll just let that go now.

On other fronts, we had a good rehearsal for Dutch Blitzkrieg yesterday. The new show is coming together nicely. You’ll see some old favorites like the Amish Oracle and The Dating Game, but there are also some new games like Four Square and Evil Twin. The show is going to be our best ever. Boy Wonder Productions are also coming back in July to film a documentary about us. Did I already mention that? That’ll all be after the Chicago trip which is going to be awesome.

Filming Documentary, and off to Chicago on Scholarship

Latest news is that I got a scholarship to go to the Second City intensive training in Chicago. It's been about 21 years since I've been in Chicago, and am looking forward to my return. Second City is famous for the lineup of comedic stars that it has produced: John Belushi, John Candy, Eugene Levy, Tina Fey, Mike Meyers, Rachael Dresch, I could go on and on. And now me. I am attending for improv instruction and comedy writing. getting a scholarship was just icing on the cake. (also now I'll have money to eat and stuff - a bonus)

Our production company is also coming back to town to film us and produce a documentary which will be coming to the small screen in your living room. It's going to be a tool to spark interest in our reality show, which is still being shopped around the networks.

In other news, I am completing the 'how to start and run a paranormal investigation group' book. It started out as the handbook for Pennsylvania Paranormal, but is morphing into this other thing, which will be for sale within the month, hopefully.

I also just got back from a Navy Convention in Norfolk VA, part of my 'regular' job. Some of it was boring, but other things were of interest. Navy Crane Center put it on, and it was mostly about safety and crane application and construction. I've been running and teaching cranes for about 30 years now. God, that's a long time.

About all for now. Youngest daughter graduates in a few weeks, youngest son just turned 16 and is looking to get his driver's permit. Yikes.

Improv Weekend

it was a pretty cool weekend albeit extremely busy and lots of driving. Started out off from work friday because of the 'good friday' thing. That morning I was working on the pool. grr. I drove to Hellerstown to get a good deal on a used pump, saved about 200 bucks doing that. Then got home and installed it. Works.

Friday night we went to Philly to see the NCrowd. Good show. It gave us a few ideas for our shows. The next few rehearsals/practices will involve games from there. If we like, and do well, they could appear in new shows.

Saturday we again drove to Philly to see Comedy Sportz. Interesting concept of two teams competing in a friendly fashion to see who can get more laughs and be more creative. Also recommended. Same deal, sharing ideas and incorporating them soon into our presentations.

Then sunday down to Baltimore for Easter/family stuff. Deb's family actually, although I've been goign long enough that I know most folks there (at least recognize them. Names are gradually coming)

This week is busy busy. Practice with DB Monday and the rest of the week at rehearsals for Driving Miss Daisy. I'm working the sound effects for the opening weekend.

Paranormal

So the latest news in my paranormal world is that two members of our group have splintered and are forming their own group. I talked to one of them and they are looking to ramp things up and do it as more than just a hobby. So the question is, do we want to ramp it up as well? I already have a full schedule and one reality show in the works, do I really want to start working on another one? Does the world need or want another paranormal show? Those shows are personality driven and I have a great personality. (so I've been told) plus I have comfort in front of an audience. hmmm

On other fronts, hockey game this weekend. Last of the season for the Royals. Taking Zack and a few others, I guess. Deb and Steph are doing the Vagina Monologues this weekend, so another fun-filled weekend will fly by.

So with Paranormal and Vagina appearing in this post, how will it come up on search engines? only the paranormal vagina can tell. Oooooh, it's psychic, too. The psychic paranormal vagina, coming to a theater near you. Oops, I said coming. I didn't mean anything by that. The coming paranormal psychic vagina. sounds like a reality show to me. : P

meditation

Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. My parents had this saying hanging on the wall. The words were written on a small plate that was inserted into a tiny cast iron pan. My one brother thought that was the coolest thing and always said that when my parents died and we divvied up the estate that was all he wanted. He's not very materialistic, which is good, because in the past he couldn't take care of shit. Now his motto is 'one day at a time', so you can take the implication and you would be right. He's a better man and the brother I am closest to. In the past I, at times, thought he was the biggest asshole on the planet, and he'd agree, then and now. But, it was the booze talking. most likely beer.

Anyway getting back to the point of this (yeah, some of these have a point) I was looking at a Dale Carnegie book, the "Golden Book" which is his list of 'rules to live by' or something like that, and I came across the rule to live in day-tight compartments. I thought I knew what this meant, but I figured I'd do some research.

It sorta came from the Bible, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" (Matthew 6:34). Now I am not much for the Bible, but there is a lot of good stuff in there. Lots of crap, too, so don't think I am preaching. far from that, but the point is made that you need to live in the moment.

This is big in all the new-age stuff as well. This isn't live for today, for tomorrow may not come, as in live in excess and don't be concerned for the future, but more cherish the moment and the day that you are in and don't let yesterday's memories or tomorrow's potential problems destroy what you have right now.

I am living in gratitude and was meditating on all the good things that I have. Cherishing my wife and children, family, home, job, stuff, possibilities. It's all out there. Do we remember in every moment all the good that is in our lives? no. But we can try. I was gripping my favorite gratitude rock and feeling the smoothness of it. The wearing that has taken place since I've had it.

One birthday present I got from my youngest son a few years ago was a gratitude rock. I knew at that point that whatever else happened to him or to me, in this life, that we had a connection and that I had done some things, probably lots of things, right. I knew he cared about me and actually paid attention to what I was into. that's really cool. It also seems the pod people have returned my youngest daughter. She is back to being more loving and caring and I appreciate that a lot.

"Yesterday's gone and tomorrow may never come, but we have this moment today." I tried to find who this quote was from, but it seems to be attached to many, so I'll thank the universe for it.

My appearance on “Tuning In” last night went well. The show will be available soon here so if you like you can check it out.

Story behind the story. I showed up rather early, around 530, because the tech manager at the station said they could use a little extra time to grab the jpeg’s and the movie clip off my flash drive. No big deal I can do that. So I get to the station and no one is around. I can hear the ‘bees’ droning but have trouble finding anyone. A couple guests for the “Issues in the African American Community” are sitting around, but no one officially from the station is there.

So Elaine and Kenny, from our ParanormalPA group, show up and Elaine and I start wondering around the station. No one is around. We walk through studios, poke our heads into offices, no one. Now in case anyone’s getting ideas, there are security cameras everywhere, probably taping our every move. But no people. Finally we find some technician working on a board, and he directs us to John (or some other name) who takes my flash drive. He has a puzzled look on his face as I explain what’s on it.

Now this flash drive isn’t dropping from Mars with no explanation. I had talked to the tech manager and he had assured me they could use it, if the files were in the format they used. I took care of that, but John is slowly shaking his head. ( I can tell inside his skull he’s thinking, “I dunno bout this”)

But he says he’ll see what he can do. (I am not faulting John in any of this, just the organizational skills of the station in general, maybe) Soon he returns to the lobby and tells me that the laptop is having a malfunction and they can’t get to my files. I guess no other computer has a USB connection. That is cutting edge technology. Not.

Luckily Elaine also brought 8 X 10 photos of the things we wanted to share, so they could scan them, or whatever they do. So we were able to talk about them on the air and the audience(??) could see them. I put the question marks in, as I don’t know what the audience is like for any BCTV show.

Anyway, the show went well, Bob Moyer is a hoot, like always. Very personable and amusing, and his deafness just adds to the charm of the show. No really, that wasn’t sarcasm, I mean it.

Publicity for the group is good and more information can be found on our website. Gosh that’s a lot of links for one entry.

Anyway I’ll be bloggiing next time about my appearance on the Y102 morning show tomorrow. Talking bout the Blitz and the show at Reading Community Players.

Hey You're doing that wrong!

Here is a question that I posed on another website that I write for: How do you approach someone to tell them that they are doing something improperly, especially when you are not in a supervisory position, or perhaps even if you don't know them? If you don't approach them are you, in effect, endorsing their negative or perhaps harmful behavior? I am not talking about anything illegal or immoral. Pause, and think about that for a moment and then move on to the next paragraph.

Ok, what I was talking about was someone at the gym improperly lifting a weight. Now they have poor form and the exercise is not going to benefit them, certainly as much as it would if they performed it correctly, and doing it their way - poor ergonimic form, could potentially hurt them.
a) you tell them about it, treading lightly, and they tell you to mind your own business.
b) you tell them about it and they thank you and do it correctly (nearly never happens)
c) you don't tell them about it, for fear of response, and they end up hurting themselves.

If C, do you feel guilty? Are you enabling them?
If A, do you ever approach anyone again? Some people appear more approachable than others, so you may tell the sweet old lady, but not the gorilla-like gym rat. Does that serve your fellow man/woman? Why are people so scared to talk to other people, even if they are not selling or telling? I have occasionally thought to myself, hey that person has really made improvements. But I don't tell them. Why? Women would think I was hitting on them (in the past this might be true) and they might be offended or worse they might like it, and then I have to say, no, no, I am happily married, not interested. Men, I am not going to tell (unless I know them really well) because they might think I am hitting on them, or (same situation as A, except, no no I am hetero)

So you don't tell people much of anything. They sure wouldn't want to hear 'hey have you gained weight since you started here?' They won't think you are hitting on them (probably) but they won't be happy to hear your news either.

So take this another step, if you dare. Now, do you tell your spouse that they are doing something wrong? Or that their cooking isn't that good tonight? Or that they are too skinny, too fat, too obsessed with ___, drink too much, smoke too much, are addicted to ____. etc. How do you tell people you love that something is negative or harmful or whatever, without hurting them?

How do you get your kids to take school more seriously, knowing that it really doesn't matter what their grades are, it matters how they approach doing things. You don't want to nag them. Especially if they are good kids (as mine are).

Communication is one of the toughest things on the planet. Unless you are working with someone to do a specific task, and you are working as a cooperative team, on a 'right now' task, communication is a frickin bear.

Don't believe me (OK I know you do. You know what I am talking about here.) There are more communications workshops available than any other type of training. It's the only training you can do over and over again and still not really improve. Learn how to drive a car. Do you repeat that training every year? Some people maybe ought to. But no. Only communication workshops are 'wash and repeat as needed'

Help, my daughter was replaced by a pod person. An evil pod person

I had someone at work recommend a book called, Your teenager is crazy, or something like that. It's written by a guy who has his doctoral degree in psychology, and his premise is that teen brains aren't developed until after puberty, and that this causes much of the wacko anti-social behavior they exhibit. The book supposedly goes into detain on how to deal with the situation without driving yourself, or them, to murder.

Now the reason they mentioned this book was because I said something about my youngest daughter driving me crazy. She vacillates between being a great kid and acting like she can't stand me. Her big thing is mornings, but really pretty much anytime, she has multiple personality disorders and all the personalities suck, unless she wants something.

Saying I am not a morning person does not allow one to be an ungrateful ungracious human being. As we all do, she needs to get over it, and act civilly. Anyone, no matter their disposition or mood, can manage to behave tolerably for a short period of time. Therefore, she can act tolerably for a short period of time. Enough to say, good morning, or mumble something somewhat coherent, along the lines of a greeting. I'm not asking for much.

I have vented on this two entries in a row, so now I am done with it. I will eventually probably talk about the book, if it helps, and if it does, I will provide a link, so anyone out there can check it out.

Butting Heads in the AM

Once again (it seems an unending cycle) my youngest daughter and I are butting heads in the morning. I have tried ignoring it, and her. I have tried being mildly pleasant, I have tried over the top cheerful. Hug, no hug, kiss no kiss. "Have a great day." Silence on both sides. Teenage wasteland. I will be so happy when this phase is over. (Hopefully before 30)

So what has she said? "I am not a morning person, Da, you know that." Yes I understand, but that does not give you carte blanche to act like crap toward other people. it's hurtful. I mean really it hurts me a great deal. I am a fixer, by nature. I try to help people, and it's frustrating when I can't. But inside the family it's even worse. She can put up a thirty second front and give me a quick hug and a peck on the cheek once a day.

I know she loves me. We've talked about all this already, she and I. We are just so similar, and yet so different, that we have trouble relating sometimes.

strep,etc

Long weekend, what with the Philly Health show, and then back to the house to do some winterizing.
How the heck does the oil go up 150 bucks in a month? That's every month now, with the budget plan. It seems the walls here are made of tissue paper. I worked on caulking and added a programmable thermostat. That should help some, but I guess we'll see.

Steph lost her house key, so I loaned her mine. I better not get locked out of the house while I am keyless. Should have thought to get a new one made yesterday, but things were weird. Rehearsal was canceled and then my day was thrown akimbo.

Still haven't heard a word from siblings about the reality show, except Jim. Glad he's responded. makes me wonder about the others. Do they not read their e-mails. That was nearly the biggest news I've ever had, and I get no response at all? strange.

Battling Strep Throat or Something

Yesterday I slept like 20 hours. Went to bed at 8 and got up at 1230, had a bowl of soup and then took a three hour nap. Throat hurts and is very tender to the touch, so I think I am going to the doctor's today.

On other fronts, got a myspace page setup for Dutch Blitzkrieg my improv comedy troupe. I am still pinching myself with everything happening with that. Next show isn't until March 21 at 7pm, at Reading Community Players

The show isn't even up on their website yet. Hopefully soon. That's all for today. having trouble concentrating right now. Focus. bleh

Wild Weekend, 3 shows, interviews, taping, production crew

First big round of applause and thanks to WonderBoy Productions, out of NYC! Megan, Andy, Collin and Donna, you guys were great! I really felt like you were part of the process, rather than being in the way as we were working. I had feelings that our regular routine would have really been all wacked out, but it all went well.

That being said it was "way different" having a crew around filming us all weekend. Doing interviews and having to critique performance and stuff was something else. Made me look at the process in a different way. Seeing how the different shots worked and how the cameras were placed gave me an idea of what reality shows must be like, multiplied by ten probably. Having two cameras was enough for this weekend.

Interviewing was actually fun. talking about the paranormal stuff with people who were somewhat unfamiliar (and in some cases {Donna} a bit weirded out by the whole thing. Spooked, if you will. Plus getting to talk about all the different aspects of my life made me realize all the stuff I pack into a day that the average person doesn't.

We found out that the trailer they are going to produce is only going to be about 5 minutes long. That's what the networks will see to decide the fate of the show (and us, at least at this point in time) Seems like they must have shot at least 15 hours worth of video, if not more. How do they decide what stays or goes? They also said if the series doesn't work out they have enough to do a documentary on us, which may be what happens. That could lead to a series later.

On another front, in another month we will be taking part in a comedy festival, I think in Harrisburg. Three troupes will be performing and it's going to be recorded and chopped into segments for MindTV, (the MTV for intelligent people)
More tv exposure, so shows should start to sell more tickets, which would be nice.

Lots more to tell about the weekend, but as always, time is short.

TV time

Quick entry I have a lot to do. WonderBoy Productions is in town today and tomorrow to film the troupe. Spending most of their time up at Jo's house, but they want to do a special interview with me talking about my book, the paranormal investigations I do and some of my characters.

While this whole thing isn't about me, the pilot will never get picked up if the group doesn't have interesting members, so it's important that we do well individually and as a group.

the show last night went really well. People were laughing like crazy pretty continuously. The bad news was that there were only about ten people there. Ugh. If we don't sell more tickets we will lose money on these shows. The good news is, the concept of the reality show is to have a fledgling group, and cover them as they flourish and grow. We pretty much have room to grow - at least audience wise. (understatement)

this is crazy. From nowhere and from nothing we are filming for tv. man oh, man.
Yeah, information available http://www.DutchBlitzkrieg.com
Our shows are tonight at 8 and tomorrow at 230 at the Theater of the Seventh Sister. Be part of history in the making partI. The roots. Think about it. In twenty years when they are doing the retrospective for our Emmy award winning show, they'll show clips of this, and a pan of the audience. Do you want to be in that pan, or left out? See you there!

TV Pilot

So newest thing in my life is that we (http://www.DutchBlitzkrieg.com) are going to be getting interviewed and filmed as we are doing our shows next weekend, and for once it's not us filming us.

A company out of Manhattan is interested in doing a bunch of footage for a documentary/pilot of an improv group as they are getting started and doing shows. sort of like a reality show, without the script. The interesting part is that they are planning on shopping this around to various networks and trying to get a deal for a series.

This is still in the rudimentary stages, but wow, pretty cool, I must say. Talk is they want to follow us around individually, work, home,hobbies, etc. we'll see what really happens.

I've never talked about this, but this is the second time I have been through something like this. I made it to the third stage interviews for a show on real estate investing. It was the same sort of thing, follow me around and see how much money I could make following their coaching and mentorship. They ended up going with some other people, but that was also pretty exciting. Some of my film ended up on an infomercial for Robert Allen. (whom I've appeared on stage with, telling stories of investing success)

Intertwined and Why?

You ever notice how you run into people that you know occasionally, but it always seems like the same people, over and over again? Why the heck is that?

And you know it most likely isn't anyone you would choose to see. I would love to run into my buddy Kenny or Brian from high school, but no. I'll see someone who I have no interest in seeing. Over and over. It's like groundhog day, the movie with Bill Murray. (I love that movie. Transformation of character is the best underlying plot, I think)

So here it is. This is a feeble example, but I knew this kid, Larry, when I was growing up. Now, if you read many of my blog entries you are thinking, another fucking Larry? Not even a pseudonym, oddly enough I have known I think 4 or 5 Larry's in my life.
Anyway this Larry is like a bully-type, but we are sort of friends. We went fishing together a lot, and he would catch the tiniest fish, keep them and eat them. I'm talkinga filet the size of a quarter. Weird.

Maybe five years later I run into him on my way to basic training at a bus station. He's on his way to juvenile detention or something. The start of his criminal career. This is the guy I see every ten years or so. I read about him in the paper, latest crime, picked up for X, whatever.
When I see him occasionally in public, I don't talk to him. He probably doesn't recognize me, but I have a great memory for people. Not always names, but faces and stories I remember.

So why is it that we see people like this? Is there some intertwined destiny? This guy doesn't want my help. Am I supposed to learn something from him? I don't know. Maybe the last appearance will be the last time I ever see him. Or maybe next time I'll say hi.

Red Head Island Mystery

Why would there be a prejudice against those with red hair? Why would it be deemed acceptable? That is my question as it is not viewed as a hate crime to be targeted simply for having a color hair which in any other situation would not be considered red.

I will amend that statement to say that there are very few people whose hair, identified independently simply as a color, would be considered red. Red is a rose (well some of them) or red is a jeep (mine) or a red hot lover (which a red head most probably is… unless they’re not.)

Ginger. Now that I like. I myself have hair that once upon a time was considered red, now the glory has faded into a brown-red and actually leaning toward gray a bit (temple-wise). Luckily my eyebrows have continued the tradition, as it began.

Ginger is one of my very favorite roots. Ginger ale is not my favorite soda, Dr. Pepper actually seems sort of reddish and that is my favorite. Is that a coincidence? I just don’t know. Ginger, the burn on my tongue, the sweet burn and enjoyable bite of it. I love it. And a radish by any other name is just as fine. Horse or no, a spicy bite that makes your tongue jump up and yelp. Yes that is a fine sensation.

new musical

I am at the beginning of writing my first musical. I have put down the first few songs on paper and sent them to the composer.

The basic story has also been set down. So now the hard part begins. I need to have realistic dialogue and story progress. It needs to be interesting enough to hold the attention of the audience. I have total confidence in the music and the songs. I also have total confidence in the plot and dialogue eventually.

As a noob though, I am nervous about how well it is all going to proceed. Is this going to take me years or months? Months.
I need to set aside time to work on this every week, if not every day.

Elementary, my dear watson, school that is....

Nearly every day I drive past the school where I attended kindergarten. It’s a small building which at the time housed grades one through four and class sizes of around 20 or 25 students. At least that is my recollection of the school. I had an odd journey through elementary school.
I went to that school for kindergarten, third and fourth grades attended a different school for first, second and fifth grade and then another school for sixth grade. In addition, I attended a fourth school for summer school one year, I think between third and fourth grade, maybe.

Why exactly, I am not sure. I know the school was overcrowded at one point, but then why did I return to it? I was also invited to attend a program for gifted children, but apparently my parents let me decide not to attend. That is a mystery to me. My memory of it was that I didn’t pass the entrance interview, but my mother told me the other version recently when somehow all this came up.
The upside of all that elementary turmoil was that I knew almost everyone when the various schools were united in the single middle school.

Why am I blogging about this? I have no idea. I am trying to find a focus for my life now and somehow I think reflecting on the past may help with that. Maybe not.

My earliest career thoughts were to be a marine biologist or a writer. In 9th grade I failed biology and somehow got involved in electronics and decided to go to vo-tech. That was against my guidance councilor’s advice, but somehow my parents let me make that decision. Again, that seems a bit odd, but I’ve always been very – hmm, I’m trying to think of a word meaning pig headed or stubborn that is positive - how about willful? I guess that’ll do, pig.

I was a bit discouraged with my writing in 7th grade. Somehow that made me give up the pen. Why did I pick it up years later?

Writers write. Whether anyone ever reads or not, I’m told writers write. I sure have written a lot of stuff that hasn’t been widely read, so I guess that saying holds true.

Now I am performing the improv and thinking about stand-up; a progression from all the shows at the theater I guess. Plus I am writing a musical. Plus I do paranormal investigation for fun. Plus I have a business selling the best supplements on the planet. Plus I have a job where I do training. Plus plus plus plus.

So the need for focus arises. But what do I focus on? Things that I enjoy, knowing that money will follow? Or do I focus on money, so I can just relax and enjoy it once it is flowing in? Or do I blog on three different websites, feel unfocused, do my hobby/hobbies, hope the entertainment stuff pays off, work a traditional job, hope for Deb to make a fortune, what to do…. AAAaaaaahhhhh!

Kids and Chores

When I was a kid. Shit did I really just say that? well, back to the story. If my father told me to do something. I dropped what I was in the middle of, and did the task. Not half assed either. totally assed. If I didn't do it right the first time there was a definite outcome that I didn't want to experience.
I told my son to shovel the walkway. It had a bit of ice and a little snow, and when I got back from the gym there was a slight trail where he had drug the shovel along.

He did get out there and do something, so I guess I should be happy that something got done. I had him go back out and re-do it. That may have to happen a third time.

I am thinking about re-posting my old blog here. I was one of the early boggers. Before we were even known as bloggers. I posted in GeoCities, but stopped when they put out a notice that all the content posted belonged to them, not to the poster. I had a fairly well followed blog that chronicaled my days as a single dad looking for love, or at least a relationship, or sometimes just a warm attractive body to hold. It told of meeting my wife and our early days. Don't know if they'll be any interest, but it's only on paper now. Maybe time to expose that old material to the world.
any thoughts?

One Day at a Time

I have heard time and again, it’s easy for you. You have such strong will power. “You know, it don’t come easy” to quote Ringo Starr. Easy is having seconds on those mashed potatoes and going for that slice of peach cobbler. Easy is sleeping in every morning and drinking every night. Easy is saying “why me” and wringing your hands.

It is tough doing what you know you ought to be doing, but it is also infinitely rewarding. I heard from the guys at the steel mill that I was sucking up to the boss by bidding on jobs and taking courses to improve my situation, but when layoffs came around, I had a job and some of those guys were standing in the unemployment line. Taking those classes at night and taking care of two kids as a single father. That didn’t come easy.

Developing your will power doesn’t come easy either. It’s one step at a time and one day at a time. One thing I do admire about folks in AA is that they know challenges and are working to overcome them. One day at a time, not the old show starring Bonnie Franklin, but this is your life, one day at a time.

Taking that first drink is easy, avoiding it is hard. Taking that second drink, shit, you are thinking about that before the first one is even done. Will power is not taking that first drink. That way the second drink doesn’t even come into the picture.

Why am I talking about AA? Because life is all about choices and making the hard choice becomes easier the more you do it. Do you want to lose weight? Choose to eat less and move more. Do you want to have your own successful business? Learn, think and do more. Find people who have done what you want to do, whatever it is, and emulate them. It’s easier walking down a beaten path, than cutting your own path, but cut your own path if there isn’t one to follow.

I really like desserts, but I tell people that I don’t because it’s easier than explaining every time that I am staying in shape. Whatever tools you use to get to the goals you set for yourself are shaped by your desire and your will. Ethical decisions are ones you never have to regret and choosing the right path becomes easier the more you do it. It might never become easy, but it does become easier. Thanks Ringo!